“Shyness is the awkwardness or apprehension some people feel when approaching or getting approached by other people,” so states Psychology Today.For some people, shyness can be seen as a character flaw, or some form of a disability or neither. It can prevent people from participating in normal social exchanges, and cause them to miss out in life.
“I don’t think it’s a ‘character flaw’ if it’s what you would call a typical average shyness. Everyone has aspects of their personality that you could classify as being shy,” said Dr. Alan Keys, City College psychology professor.
It is a part of one’s personality that may have been taught at a young age that children should be seen and not heard. Or shyness was simply caused by some incident in their life that made them tend to avoid interacting with people.
“It is not a ‘character’ it is not a ‘flaw’, and there are shy people in the world who get along very well.” said Angelia Jovanovic, a City College counselor. “It can be a character trait but I believe some research has shown that it can be physiological too. It’s not only how you have been brought up but it could be something, the way your physiology is constructed that could be leading to your shyness.”
The social part of the college experience is not just about meeting new people and trying new things, it’s also an integral part of the education process.
“Students who get involved in school outside of class (for example, joining study groups or clubs) tend to do better overall in college, and extreme shyness may cause a student to not seek out connections,” said Julie Hawthorne, communication studies professor.
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Most people need motivation to get over these hurdles and open themselves up to other people, but for some it can seem like such a daunting task to seek the help they need, even when the possibility of failing without it exists.
There are some steps to overcome shyness. These steps won’t lead to an overnight change, but they will improve a person’s social ability and help him/her open up to the world around him/her.
Public speaking groups are designed to help people who have difficulty speaking to crowds. They help the person maintain eye contact with the audience and a good vocal tone.
Another method of working around shyness is to take small steps in interacting with people, setting up time to talk to teachers during office hours can be beneficial to a student who wants to get information from an instructor but does not want to ask their questions during class.
“If the shyness is due to social anxiety, there is help in the form of counseling, medication, cognitive behavioral therapy, and practice in social situations,” said Hawthorne.
