Christine Carey | Managing Editor
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This past week has been one of those weeks worthy of a major relapse, intense psychotherapy or the time to invest in a punching bag with a picture of the judicial system taped to the top of it. The system once again has me by my imaginary balls. I feel as if I am the equivalent to a whore—constantly being screwed. The worst part is I don’t get paid for it.
One person I know I can count on to talk to about my legal troubles and worries is my big brother Sean. He’s 10 years older than me, has the same kind of humor as I do and always knows how to boost my mood without using alcohol or any other tasty narcotic.
Sean listens to a lot of talk radio. When I say a lot I mean this guy can list the name of every a.m. station like a straightedge preppy in fifth grade can name all 50 states and their capitols. It’s actually pretty impressive.
To sum up our conversation, he basically listened to me whine and complain about my situation. To cheer me up turned on an old broadcast of Michael Savage speaking on his nationally syndicated radio show, “The Savage Nation.”
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Savage began with playing the song “Everybody’s Dixie” in the background of his broadcast and screamed, “Let’s bring it on! Bomb Iran. Bring our boys home now! Get every hunter in America armed to the teeth! Throwback bastards! I’m so sick of them! I’m so sick of the brainwashing about Islam and Muslims and the Koran! Shove it! Shove it all! I’m sick of it!”
After turning off the music he mentioned how he’s never lived through a brainwashing like he’s lived through for the past five years. Many people all over the nation were shocked, played repeats all over and listened with jaws dropped. My brother and I just laughed our asses off because we couldn’t believe the guy had enough balls to say this over a nationally publicized radio program.
Of course, my brother and I do not agree with everything this lunatic says. The part we did agree with however is the brainwashing. We both feel that our government is brainwashing Americans, not about Iran, Iraq or Afghanistan, but the way it works and treats its citizens.
We both agreed that if we had our own talk show like Savage we would be screaming the same way. However, we would be screaming at every law enforcement official, government representative, and every bastard at the White House who decides to use our tax money to bail out companies who screwed themselves more than a pre-pubescent teenager.
I guess my point is that listening to someone bitch and complain about something I totally do not agree with at all made me think of what I do agree with. The least the government could do is use a condom, so that I have a sense of security while I’m getting screwed.
