Gung-ho cowboys shoot from the hip with a freshly-rolled cigarette seeping from the corner of their mouths. Barrels are loaded and heads covered with a ten-gallon hat.
The lassoing of big business, Christian extremists screaming anti-gay remarks and fracking things up.
Children sit at the same podium preaching peace, love and progression. They sway back and forth with tambourines, flutes and ukuleles.
“Relent your guns,” they say, “and your 32 oz. sodas.”
This is in accordance with the New York ban on the 32 oz. soda, a staple of the American diet.
For years, I’ve regurgitated the same “vote or die” bulls— spiel to my mother.
“The founders of this country fought for our rights, you unpatriotic jerk,” I’ve told her.
However, at the all-knowing age of 19 and with a presidential election coming up, I’ve finally realized my lack of enthusiasm in democracy.
The democratic process may be filled with educated and intuitive voters, but I’ve met very few people in general who fit this description.
In reality—and to the demise of my sanity—the same people, who can’t get my order right at the drive-thru are also given the right to vote. People I wouldn’t trust with a turd…» Read More